Like most of us, Anneke Rees wants time, and lots of it, to live on this earth. However, she is not afraid of death, and certainly not afraid of talking about it.
Rees and her friend Tom Easkin have been hosting Death Cafés in Vancouver to do just that, because they feel that actually talking about death can add value to life.
Rees will be coming to Bowen Island on September 29th to host such a conversation at the Snug Café. I asked her how the event will be structured and she said it will start with tea and cake, and then…
“The conversation can go anywhere,” she says.
That said, she emphasizes this is not a bereavement group.
In the five cafés she has hosted so far, Rees says a number of common themes have emerged.
“The thing that has come out, is that people want to talk more about dying than death itself,” says Rees. “No one is ready to think about death in the present. Nobody wants to die in pain, and nobody wants to die alone.”
For Rees, who volunteered in palliative care at St. Paul’s hospital at the height of the AIDS epedemic, having experienced death, she says, makes her more aware of life and full of gratitude for what is happening around her.
“I’ve learned that when someone dies, they leave so much with those who were with them when they were living,” says Rees. “Memories remain, and the impacts made by the person who died stay as well. Both of my parents are dead, but in a funny way, both of them sit on my shoulders still.”
A maximum of 20 people can fit in to Bowen’s Death Café, so if you are interested in attending, book at deathcafe.com and book under the Bowen Island event. Rees says that if there is enough interest, she will create a second event on Bowen.
