When we first heard our mentors Gay and Katie Hendricks say that you can revitalize yourself and any relationship in just 10 minutes, we thought “Come on! That’s impossible!!”
Did you have a similar response when you read this article’s title?
As relationship and life coaches, we see many people who feel overburdened and want to rejuvenate their relationship with their partner, family member, work associate, friend and ultimately with themselves. Often, they want us to fix them, it, or someone else in their world because they don’t know what to do. Truthfully, we occasionally feel that way too. We notice it pretty quickly though and then choose this 10-minute technique that we’ll share with you.
First some context. Invariably when we dig deeper, people discover that they’ve been putting their chores and “to-do” lists ahead of what gives them joy and pleasure. With lots of responsibilities and busy schedules, we all can get very involved in getting things done and we forget about happiness.
What Gay and Katie taught us, and what we recommend to our clients, is this: Leave your duties and assignments behind for just 10 minutes and begin a daily 10-minute “me-first” creativity program.
In other words, take care of yourself every day and start living from your creativity and joy. Watch what happens to your sense of aliveness and energy throughout your day.
When you give yourself permission to live from inspiration rather than routine, you will feel more free to focus on your tasks again. Just taking 10 minutes to do anything that you enjoy and delight in can totally revitalize you: be it to go for a walk, write a poem, sing, dance, play an instrument, meditate, journal, go for a jog, do some yoga, paint a picture, water plants, read, breathe, do a puzzle or anything else you love to do.
We recommend doing this first thing in the morning because you will have a lot more choice in the privacy of your own home. But then, why not share your joy in your work environment or generate time for yourself whenever you catch yourself needing it?
The famous mythologist and writer Joseph Campbell called this “following your bliss.” He said, “If you follow your bliss, you put yourself on a kind of track that has been there all the while, waiting for you, and (then) the life that you ought to be living is the one you are living. Wherever you are – if you are following your bliss, you are enjoying that refreshment, that life within you, all the time.”
You can always go back to your lists, chores and routines. They are not going anywhere. But you have changed. Connecting with your creativity and originality, you suddenly feel more alive and inspired. Then you are so much more attractive to your friends, colleagues, family or partner than when you mindlessly and efficiently, but joylessly, go about your day. Others will be attracted to this new inspired self and you’ll be available for connection. You and those around you will want to move closer together, to share, co-create, exchange ideas and combine your energies in new imaginative ways.
We invite you to take one simple step toward discovering, pursuing and thriving through cultivating your creativity and joy. Just 10 minutes a day. Once you do, we have no doubt that what happens for us will also happen for you.
This skill of revitalizing your relationship to yourself and others is simple but requires practice. Just like riding a bike, at first it is difficult, but then you hit balance and suddenly you can do it.
Keep practising. That’s what we do.
Jack and Soorya Resels have studied and trained with world renowned relationship experts Drs. Katie and Gay Hendricks (Hendricks Institute in Southern California). Jack and Soorya are certified Conscious Loving and Living Coaches and have worked with hundreds of individuals and couples.
